Fame - Asking For It

My friends and I had a rather passionate discussion about fame and celebrities who complain about it, and so it is my post today.

Both of my friends were in agreement that celebrities have no right to complain about the trappings of fame because they asked for it.  They sought out fame, and they should have known what would happen once they attained it.  I believe we got on this track because we were discussing Tiger Woods, and my friend said that he kept blaming the media and the press for blowing up his story.  In any case, my other friend piped in, "I totally agree.  I work with actors (in a theatre) and whenever they complain, I just think, 'You asked for it.  You sought fame.  You should have known." 

Whenever I hear this argument, I wonder if there isn't a bit of jealousy involved in it.  After all, how can you not feel sorry for people who are hounded by hoards of paparazzi with flashing light bulbs and less than stellar personalities, chasing you down and hurling insults just to get a scandalous money-grubbing picture?  How can you not feel for them unless you in some way wish you were them, and despise their complaining of a life you wish you had?  Of course, I did not mention this idea to my friends, who probably would have disregarded such an idea. 

My friend who talked of Tiger then said that she also could not sympathize with celebrities who whine about the press.  She said that there are much worse things in the world.  This is true.  But this would mean that one would have to experience the worst of the worst of human experience to be able to ever complain about anything, wouldn't it? 

I thought about this response later, which was, "What if you wanted children, and then you had children, and then you complained because they did this or that?  Does that mean I would be justified in saying, 'You asked for it.  You wanted children, so you can't complain.'"  Imagine how repressed and frustrated the parents of the world would be if that were the rule to go by.

However, instead of all these rather controversial sentiments and statements, I instead said, "Look, in everything there's good and bad.  All they're saying is that there is a side of fame that's not good, that's bad.  I mean, fame isn't always people adoring you.  There are those people who do, but there are also people who go, 'You suck!' and hate you."  To which my friend replied that whenever you put yourself out there, you put yourself in a position to have such extreme views foisted upon you.  But that's the thing, fame is not all good.  "And there is a bad side to fame," I said, "which is what they are complaining about.  And they have a right to complain, because it's not good."  To which my third friend added, "It makes them more human."  Exactly.  And then I added, "Would you rather they say, "Oh gosh, I love my life.  Everyone adores me."?  To which, my friend said, "No, of course not, you don't want them rubbing it in.  I just don't like celebrities who go, 'Oh, poor me.'"  But what she did want was an acknowledgment of appreciation for the fans that brought them to where they were, because without the fans, they wouldn't have anything.  That argument I could agree with, and said so, and said that perhaps what they needed to do was to do both, appreciate and complain.

I also added, sometimes, you don't seek fame, it just comes to you.  I mentioned Susan Boyle, and what happened to her.  And the cast of Twilight.  They thought that it would be a cult, kitschy movie, not some blockbuster hit.  My friend argued that they had to have known it would be a hit; the book is a bestseller!  That would be like saying they didn't know Harry Potter would be a big hit.  But I argued, would an actor who's never read the book know?  And my friend, who didn't like actors she knew complaining, stepped in and said that she did have to give exception to those people, like Tiger Woods, who don't actually seek fame, but who become famous for doing something really well.  (Thank you!)  Athletes and other people of that caliber don't always seek the fame, it comes to them, and so she could see that they have more right to complain.  

All in all, it was a very interesting discussion.  I suppose the lesson to be learned here is that we can all complain, but we also at the same time, need to appreciate the good things that we have as well as those people who make it possible, so that we're not seen as ungrateful, but just as human.